mms third month-JULY 2007

mms 1.7.7
by sk
What is the similarity between TALAM(taal in music) and computer?

ANS::Talam is lap-tap.Computer is laptop


mms 2.7.7
by prando
Why did the BULL get excited on seeing the construction of a building?

Ans:Because there were JALLI stones and the bull was trained for jalli kattu


mms 3.7.7
Which is the holy place of our body?

Ans:TEMPLE


mms 4.7.7
sk thatuvam
A person maybe someBODY or noBODY.
But after death he is a deadBODY


mms 5.7.7
sk thatuvam
Fan-a HI la veccha kaathu nariya varum.
Aana height-la veccha kaathe varaathu


mms 6.7.7
sk thatuvam
you may have read about IC realisation(Integrated Circuit realisation)
Actually when u realise something u say I see (IC)


mms 7.7.7
by sk
How does footware connect F1 to computer?

Ans:IN computer we have booting.
In F1 we have schumaher


mms 8.7.7
by sk
Which coutry is a headache to USA?

Ans: IRAQ,cos USA keeps applying bomb(balm)


mms 9.7.7
by sk
Which is the old number?

And: ten cos in roman,it is X(ex)


mms 10.7.7
by sk
Why is a sub inspector standard?

Ans: cos he is SI (SI is the standard system of measurement)



mms 11.7.7
by sk
Which is the strongest part of a dog?

Ans:its tail i.e. vaal...(in tamil it is vaal=wall which is very strong)


mms 12.7.7
by sk
why do people get sticky after death?

Ans:cos they go either to Sorgam (sor-gum) or to naragam (nara-gum)


mms 13.7.7
by sk
A man is unmarried and has never had any contacts with any girl.yet he becomes father.how?

Ans:he has become a christian FATHER(head of church)


mms 14.7.7
sk thatuvam
none can equal the warmth of a mother.
if u anagram "mother" u get "thermo"


mms 15.7.7
by sk
A man was sitting on a chair.a fly came and sat on him.he started making sounds like a bell.why?

Ans:cos ots man+e(fly) thats mani


mms 16.7.7
sk thatuvam
King has kingdom
Queen has queendom
but both have KREEDOM


mms 17.7.7
sk thatuvam
when there are 2 teams(generally) playing a game,
only one is selected as winner.Thats why we call it as won (one)


mms 18.7.7
by sabarish(subscribe's contribution)
Why is surgery very bad?

Ans: cos its IN-human


mms 19.7.7
prando thatuvam
KO is 'Knock Out' in boxing.it is given when the naaku(tongue) is out(i.e. out cold)


mms 20.7.7
prando thatuvam
Cancer is very deadly,
UNLESS its your sun sign


mms 21.7.7
sk thatuvam
In chess you mate check or mate.
But the board is only checked


mms 22.7.7
by sk
Where does trignometry sleep?
in Pi(i.e. pai=mat)

if its colder then its 2Pi
if its even colder then cot



mms 23.7.7
by prando
Even if u wear a shirt and pant it will be informals.hom?

Ans:By inserting the formals it becomes informals


mms 24.7.7
by sk
If u lick jewels u will laugh.how?

Ans:licking jewels is nagai suvai (taste) thats nagai chuvai ..thats comedy(in tamil)



mms 25.7.7
contribution by saravanan
If your sister gives u information what will u call her?

Ans: infosys (INFO SYS)


mms 26.7.7
by sk
Which number system wasinvented by animal?

Ans: its BINARY (cos it is BY NARI(fox))


mms 27.7.7
by sk
which detergent can we eat?

Ans: aspRIN (detergent=RIN)



mms 28.7.7
by sk
what is comon to a dog and bark?

ans: BARK



mms 29.7.7
contribution by siddarth
How do u make 10 as 5 without writing anything??

Ans:Just put the "1" over "0" and it will become 5(phi greek letter)


mms 30.7.7
contribution by saravanan
Which is the shortest part of a human??

Ans:its leg (cos its kaal in tamil and kaal = 1/4 i.e 0.25)


mms 31.7.7
by sk
Which is the hardest programming language?

Ans: its PASCAL (KAL=stone(in tamil))

mms second month-june 2007

MMS trial 1.6.7
BY PRANDO
Which oinment never stays in a same place??

Ans:MOOV(move)


MMS trial 2.6.7
by prando
What mode of transport does a semi-conductr take?

Ans:an epiTAXI !!


mms trial 3.6.7
by prando
Which physical quantity never gets old?

Ans:YOUNG's modulus


mms trial 4.6.7
by prando
Which band plays sorrow and soulful music??

ANS: husBAND

mms trial 5.6.7
by prando
A thief went to a locked house.He didnt have any keys.only mobile,what did he do?

Ans:HE pressed the menu buton followed by asterix key


mms 6.6.7
by prando
what is just one letter but very long??

Ans:Q(queue)

mms 7.6.7
by sk
Why are people colourful on sunday?

ANS::cos its a holiday(holi day)!!


mms 8.6.7
by sk
Why are adult rated films fizzy?

ANS::because they are A-rated (AERATED)

mms 9.6.7
by sk
which medicine is an entertainer?

Ans:its MOOV cos its MOO-V (Thats movie)


mms 10.6.7
by sk
a man goes to pawn broker shop and kept his mouth shut.he didnt speak a word.suddenly the seth gave him money(the seth didnt owe the man anything).how?

Ans:cos silence is GOLDen


mms 11.6.7
sk thatuvam

Ans:It may be called as shopping COMPLEX.But what we do there is REAL shopping


mms 12.6.7
by sk

what is bruce-lee's girlfriend's name?

Ans:LOVE-lee

what do u call Bruce lee if he has broken one hand?

Ans:single handed-lee



mms 13.6.7
sk thatuvam

Unakku evvalo than fans irunthaalum,ceiling fan or table fan thaan kaathu kudukkum

mms 14.6.7
In a kiln which is the worst worker?

Ans:a BRICK.cos it keeps getting FIRED

mms 15.6.7
thatuvam

nee enna thaan un cell phone-a charge pannaalum,recharge pannalenaa peasave mudiyaathu

16.6.7
Every night one song of SIVAJI film is missing.which?

Ans:its ORU KOODAI SUNLIGHT (cos in night,there is no sunlight)

17.6.7
by prasanth
What can ravana do alone that we cannot do?

Ans:He can sing in chorus alone


MMS 18.6.7
by Srikrishna
What company manufactures tails for animals?

Ans:Quality walls (tail is wall in tamil)


MMS 19.6.7
By prasanth
Why is electronic bow dangerous?

Ans:Because electronic-bow is E-VIL(tamil) Which is EVIL


MMS 20.6.7
By sk
Why did the newly born twin baby boys created trouble for their dad?

Ans:Cos they were nuisance(new sons) !!!


MMS 21.6.7
By prasanth
Why were the doctors urgently hunting optimistic people?

Ans:because they needed B+(be positive) blood.

MMS 22.6.7
By Sk
When you give flower to a dog it will become timid.how?

Ans:Cos its a poo (flower) nai thats a Poonaiand cat is timid


MMS 23.6.7
By Srikrishna
Which is the correct stone?

Ans:A meteorite(right)!!


MMS 24.6.7
By sk

Me:nobody knows tht u r goin 4 xtra clas
Friend:wat?me?i not goin 4 any class
Me:see.i am rite.noone knows.not even u !

mms 25.6.7
by sk
if there are many people in a gym we can eat it.how?

Ans:cos its a jam(like traffic jam) in a gym,thats JIM JAM (biscuit)

mms 26.6.7
by sk
When a writer is unable to think of anything to right he is said to have a writer's block.how to remove it?

Ans:Watch SIVAJI...its a BLOCKbuster

mms 27.6.7
by prando
What musical instrument does GANDHIji hate?

Ans:VIOLINs (violence)


MMS 28.6.7
BY SK
Why is frequency violent?

Ans:Cos it hurts

MMS 29.6.7
BY sk
When is a cat not clean?

Ans:When it is a kitten(cos a group of kitten is litter)

MMS 30.6.7
BY SK
There was a car that was painted with a variety of colours.suddenly al cars started praying to it.Why?

ANS:Cos it was a holy(colourful==holi) car

mms first month-April-2007

mms 1.4.7
If u see rajnikanth before a camera you are lucky.how??

ANS::because you hav seen a shooting star !!

mms 2.4.7

(told on march 30th after a gruelling session of marchpast)
Till now We had march past

From now on march past !


mms3.4.7

What current does radio mirchi run on??
ANS:: DC current.cos,AC is cool but radio mirchi is hot ..so DC.

mms 4.4.7

If "net" is south pole then what is north pole??
ANS:: "mag" cos,in a magnet one half is north pole and the other half is south pole

mms 5.4.7
There is no current or gas in your house.U want hot water but tap water is cold.How to get hot water??
ANS::Add some chilli powder and the water will become HOT !!

mms 6.4.7
What is hard water commonly known as??
ANS:: Hard water !!

mms 7.4.7

Sundar:Where is this answer da??
Me:Here
Sundar:Why are you turning so many pages?
me:THIRUPPI THIRUPPI PADICHAATHAN NYAABAGAM IRUKKUM

mms.8.4.7
A man draws a line on the road at 1:30 pm.What has he done??
ANS::he has done pseudo code(soodu in tamil is hot)


mms 9.4.7
TR POEM
Wheel la irukku spoke
Shoe le irukku spike
I have a bike
speaker le pesa theva mike
->This do u like?

mms 10.4.7

Why is der a lot of noise in a place where they make tennis and badminton bats??
ANS::cos they are making racket(noise)!!!

mms 11.4.7
There is a girl named usha.She is a bad girl.yet she is sweet.how??
ANS::because she is Bad Usha tha is BADUSHA(a sweet)

mms 12.4.7
Why is impossible to get a piano in a cell phone?
ANS::because cell has no cords(chords)!!!

mms 13.4.7
What is the similarity between sunscreen and clearscreen ???
ANS::both are used in sea( C language)

mms 14.4.7
A woman's tooth is good for health.how?
ANS::because it is her pal(teeth is pal in tamil)..thats HERBAL !!!

mms 14.4.7-Tamil new year special
Thatuvam
During new year oru pudhu year irukku
but, during new moon,old moon kooda illaye !!

mms 15.4.7
Why do the say "Hello" in mike ??
ANS::cos its a microphone (in phone we say hello...same way)

mms 16.4.7
We are fans of a conductive hand.how?
ANS::conductive hand...that is mho kai thats mokkai !!!

mms 17.4.7(a few days after tamil new year)
HAPPY NEW EAR
generally we have an old ear but listen to new jokes.but this time u had a new ear(new year) but old joke

mms 18.4.7
A man sneezes while making a sock.he suddenly dies.why?
ANS::because S H(sneeze) O C K -the man dies of shock

mms 19.4.7
tattuvam
nee left pona rightum pogalaam.aanaa right aana wrong aagave mudiyathu !!

mms 20.4.7
When you need 90 degrees angle,
the RIGHT-angle is the right angle.

mms 21.4.7
tattuvam
If a vehicle gets breakdown it wont start.
But,if the vehicle's break is down it wont stop !!

mms 22.4.7
tattuvam
people will be sad if they have any dosham.But they will be happy if they have SAN'DOSHAM'


mms 23.4.7
What will u do if u want kerosene??
ANS::Ask the phy lab asistant for some oil...what he gives is krishnan oil..thats krishnaail(thats kerosene)
(a note for non SSNites the phy lab assistant is KRISHNAN)

mms 24.4.7
thattuvam
nee enna dhan adha male voice-nu sonnaalum,female voice than pictch mela irukkum !!!

mms25.4.7
Why do mosquitoes never bite indian cricket players?

ANS::Because they get easily ALL OUT

mms 26.4.7
Ideaology
When someone doesnt agree wid what u say they r offering some resistance 1k or 2k
But when they agree dey offering no resistance i.e. zero k that is ok

mms 27.4.7
What is the similarity between microsoft corporation and a carpenter??
ANS::Both make WINDOWS !!!

mms 28.4.7
A man has latest film DVD but its not a thiruttu VCD.how??
ANS::because its a thiruttu DVD !!!

mms 29.4.7
which is the most oily day? and which is the coolest day???
ANS::
oily day is Friday(fry-day)

coolest day is sunday(SUNDAE)

mms 30.4.7
is hooke's law male or female??
ANS:: FEMALE.because "hook" is "KOKKI" and hence KOKILA which is female

mms 30.4.7.b
Why is the internet very clean?
ANS::Because people keep SURFing it !!